I’m reading Daniel Pink’s new book, DRIVE: The surprising truth about what motivates us, in which he explains how we’re driven less by extrinsic motivators (money, goals, rewards) and more by intrinsic ones (the joy of creating or solving). I get that. Boy do I get it.
Here are the various creative endeavors I have going on at the moment (and for which I’m not getting paid):
- Revising my novel, Maharishiville
- Writing a screenplay, “One Woman Farm”
- Co-developing “know your food” video shorts
- Co-writing Eating 101 for this little publishing endeavor Brian and I started called Not Long Books
- Finding ways to promote the first Not Long Book, Fat, Dumb and Lazy
- Posting to my blog (not nearly often enough)
- Coordinating a Farm-to-Fork lunch with go-local guru Jamie Moore speaking
- Co-chairing the 2011 Pennwriters conference
- Oh, and considering getting my masters in Food Studies at Chatham’s new program
That last one is the what has me awake at 3:30 a.m. writing this post. I went to the open house yesterday. Food Studies is a brand new program starting this fall (one of only 3 in the US), and the farm campus is practically in my backyard. I feel like this is a sign. Plus, on Friday the Martha Beck Quote of the Day was this:
“Your next heroic task may be to have a baby or change jobs or stand up for yourself. The key is to follow the call — the impulse to do something extraordinarily inconvenient and demanding. You’ll regret accepting the call a thousand times. Only when it’s over will you truly realize how grand your adventure felt, and what an awesome story you have to tell.”
What the heck would I do with a Master of Arts in Food Studies? I have no idea. I don’t really want a traditional job nor do we really need the paycheck (well, except to pay back the school loans!). Maybe the degree is to give me the credentials to write about food and health. Maybe it’s to guide me in turning our 130 acres into the something special I can’t quite envision yet. Or maybe I won’t even complete the degree — maybe I’m just supposed to connect with the people there for some reason.
Lately I’ve been trying to be open to whatever the universe brings me that feels right. Thus the overflowing feast of creative endeavors listed above. I find myself thinking, “I’ve got too many things on my plate! Jack of all trades is master of none!” I’m already behind on my projects (albeit the deadlines are self-imposed). But here’s a thought: maybe the Food Studies wouldn’t be just another helping on the plate, but rather the thing that holds all my creativity together — the plate itself, to extend the metaphor. That might explain why, while I usually feel overwhelmed and pulled in too many directions, this spring I instead feel a growing sense of anticipation.
But this just in from my over-thinking brain: Am I’m going back to school just for some structure in my creative, willy-nilly life? And if so, is that a valid reason or just plain pitiful? And for God’s sake, Julie (yes I’m now talking to myself), don’t you realize that many people would love to have your free, unstructured life? Are you ready to give that up? Going back to school involves real deadlines. Commitment. What if you can’t hack it?
Then again, here was Martha’s Quote of the Day on Thursday:
“Trying yields either success or an opportunity to learn; not trying has no positive result besides avoiding mockery or envy that (research shows) wouldn’t be nearly as big or bad as we fear.”
Saying no would be easier and yet I want to say yes. So yeah, I guess I have the kind of drive Daniel Pink is talking about. I just wish I new what I was driving toward.